Stolen flash from miniclips.com.
A file swap.

Coop83 Morning Report

Blams 7,950 (+21)
Saves 3,462 (+11)
Total 11,412 (+32)
Points to Elite Guard Captain 1,088

Making progress up the ladder and I will soon be within three digits of rank up.

I have not been here for a long while. I guess that everyone (especially slash) is rolling. Got back home a few days ago and Duke spent around 4 days sleeping. :P However, Duke decided to come back to work before everyone here drives past him without paying him medical insurance. Sure, his time will be extremly limited during the 3-months break, but every point counts. So let's the fun begin!

At 5/10/06 05:48 AM, mr_trivia wrote: 5/10/06 Report - As of 0540 Hours:
Blam/Protect Rank #488 -1 from yesterday
Blams: 3607 +1 from yesterday
Saves: 2087 +3 from yesterday
Next Rank: 306 points until Master Sergeant

5/11/06 Report - As of 0535 Hours:
Blam/Protect Rank #488 unchanged from yesterday
Blams: 3610 +3 from yesterday
Saves: 2090 +3 from yesterday
Next Rank: 300 points until Master Sergeant

At 5/10/06 10:45 PM, Socially-Failed wrote: Eagle: Your ranked #91 in B/P

Phanrom: Ranked #92, and yes, no way in hell will I stay ahead of Slash. ( even at home )

Slash: Your ranked #101 in B/P

Damn... I can't I belive I just mispelled THAT, well any way, forgive the utter stupidty of my last post.

Daily report

Blams: 9
Saves: 7
Total B/P: 16. Just another Wednesday.
B/P until EGSC: 1127
Posts: 6

At 5/10/06 09:59 PM, -RyanKajito- wrote: What day has the least/crappiest flash submitted? I need to know and I can't find out which one. I know definetely not Saturday.

I guess either Wednesday or Thursday.

At 5/10/06 10:04 PM, SlashFirestorm wrote: Slash N' Littlewashu 3 got good luck on the portal! :-P
Everyone drop a review for it if ya get bored!

I'll most likely review once my dad has stopped playing music loud. I will have to review that flash today.

DEFCON Update:

No change...still DEFCON 4. I will change it to DEFCON 3 if it speeds up today, but as yesterday has proven, the Portal has been slow as hell.

At 5/11/06 05:28 AM, Dream_of_Duke wrote: I have not been here for a long while. I guess that everyone (especially slash) is rolling. Got back home a few days ago and Duke spent around 4 days sleeping. :P However, Duke decided to come back to work before everyone here drives past him without paying him medical insurance. Sure, his time will be extremly limited during the 3-months break, but every point counts. So let's the fun begin!

Let the games begin! Welcome back, Colonel!

At 5/11/06 07:16 AM, Ghost_Phantom wrote: Damn... I can't I belive I just mispelled THAT, well any way, forgive the utter stupidty of my last post.

*chuckles slightly*

But come on, everyone makes typos. I hate it when I type a nice, long, intelligent post, and then I find like 4 typos when I reread it. Shows my impatience to get the damn post on Newgrounds...

At 5/11/06 11:04 AM, EagleRock wrote: DEFCON Update:

=(

Well, at least I won't miss much...

But come on, everyone makes typos. I hate it when I type a nice, long, intelligent post, and then I find like 4 typos when I reread it. Shows my impatience to get the damn post on Newgrounds...

If I make a big "thoughtful, elaborate" post, I copy it into Word to see if spell check notices any errors. I find it's the simplest way (as long as auto-correct is off, of course).

At 5/11/06 12:11 AM, JoKeR_ADT wrote: Finally I'm now a level 11 and now I have a voting power of 8 votes as well.

congrats on getting to level 11 here is your reward (gives JoKeR_ADT a kiss)

Oh slash you might want to get yourself check for any STD's after being with little afro.

lol

that is what happens when you get drunk you mind plays trick on you and you wind out sleeping with A ulgy Milf

Congrats to Joker ADT on getting to level 11 I'm sure you'll find the brass knucks to be a bit more badass than the boxing glove.

At 5/11/06 12:41 PM, Littlewashu wrote: congrats on getting to level 11 here is your reward (gives JoKeR_ADT a kiss)

Thank you

I hope Slash's hart isn't broken again! lol

that is what happens when you get drunk your mind plays trick on you and you wind out sleeping with A ulgy Milf

I'm sure Slash's has learned his lesson.

At 5/11/06 12:48 PM, pepeatumi wrote: Congrats to Joker ADT on getting to level 11 I'm sure you'll find the brass knucks to be a bit more badass than the boxing glove.

I love the brass knuckle I'm so glad I got it now because I hate the boxing glove.

It will suck when I become a level 12.

Congrats Joker for lvl11! I don't really like the pic, but it's ok as long as you enjoy it!

Good afternoon everyone. Just stopping in to say that I've retired my Captain's bars in favor of a Major's silver leaf. Unlike some of you guys, I do not have a creative mind in which to write an interesting story involved.

Well, back to the front line, which, as usual, is slow as hell.

*Salute*

At 5/11/06 01:42 PM, -Casualty- wrote: Congrats Joker for lvl11! I don't really like the pic, but it's ok as long as you enjoy it!

Thanks

At 5/11/06 03:50 PM, ThePunisher52 wrote: Good afternoon everyone. Just stopping in to say that I've retired my Captain's bars in favor of a Major's silver leaf. Unlike some of you guys, I do not have a creative mind in which to write an interesting story involved.

Congrats on your new rank Major Punisher52

Well, back to the front line, which, as usual, is slow as hell.

Yeah the portal has been slow this whole week (well at least for me) I don't think I even have 600 points yet.

*Salute*

*Salute*

Congrats to our new Major ThePunisher52!

At 5/11/06 03:50 PM, ThePunisher52 wrote: Unlike some of you guys, I do not have a creative mind in which to write an interesting story involved.

How ironic of you to mention that…

…but first, a few notes on this one:

1) Note that all insults in here are in the spirit of fun...we're all friends here. I don’t want ANYONE getting upset over a joke.
2) Bonus points if you can tell me what movie this is from!
3) I tried to get as many people in this as possible. If you’re left out, I apologize.

==============

Brigadier General SlashFirestorm, Staff Sergeant -Pingu-, Major General Ghost_Phantom, and many others come storming up to the house of Brigadier General EagleRock. With them, they are pulling along hot_and_charming, whom they are ready to burn, as you can tell by their screams. EagleRock comes out to address the screams, while an inquisitive Supreme Commander Nimmer watches from the side.

Crowd: BURN HER! BURN HER!
SlashFirestorm: We found an alt! May we burn her?
EagleRock: How do you know she is an alt?
-Pingu-: Well, she looks like one!
Crowd: Yeah! Yeah! BURN HER!
EagleRock: Bring her forward...

The crowd brings her forward, with cries of "Burn her" in the background.

hot_and_charming: I'm not an alt, I'm NOT an alt!
EagleRock: But you appear as one!
hot_and_charming: THEY made me up like this! And this isn't my profile, it's a false one!
Crowd: NO! NO, we didn't!
EagleRock (to crowd): Well?
SlashFirestorm: Well, we did do the sig...
EagleRock: The sig?
SlashFirestorm: ...and her favorites. But she IS an alt!
Bahamut-: Yeah!
Crowd: BURN HER! BURN HER!
EagleRock: Did you make her up like this?
KungFuCow: NO!
Crowd: NO! NO! NO!

The crowd murmurs.

SlashFirestorm: ...a bit.
Seamonky: …a bit.
-Pingu-: Yes, yes, a bit.
Ghost_Phantom: But he has got a picture!

Ghost_Phantom points at it voraciously.

EagleRock: What makes you think she is an alt?
Socially-Failed: WELL, SHE TURNED ME INTO A N00B!
EagleRock (pauses): A n00b?
Socially-Failed (long pause): I got better...
Ghost_Phantom: BURN HER ANYWAY!
Crowd: BURRRRRN!

The crowd continues yelling.

EagleRock: Quiet, quiet! There are WAYS of telling if she is an alt.
SlashFirestorm: There are?
Crowd: Tell us! Tell us!
EagleRock: Tell me, then. What do we do with alts?
-Pingu-: They get burned!
Crowd: BURRRRRN!!!!!
EagleRock: And what do we burn apart from alts?
pepatumi: MORE ALTS!!!
Ghost_Phantom: SHH!

The crowd thinks.

-Pingu-: …n00bs!
EagleRock (nods): So, why do alts burn?

The crowd pauses.

Bahamut-: …Be-…because they’re made…of a n00b?
EagleRock: Good! Heh heh.
Crowd: Oh, yeah. Ahh.
EagleRock: So, how do we tell whether she is made of a n00b?
Agent_Smith_: Make a spammer out of her!
EagleRock: Ah, but can you not also make a spammer out of an asshole?
Agent_Smith_: Oh, yeah…
face_on_fire: True…

The crowd pauses once more, puzzled.

EagleRock: Tell me. Does a n00b stay on the BBS?
SlashFirestorm: No!
ThePunisher52: No, it gets banned!
EagleRock: What also get banned?
Ghost_Phantom: Uh…Wade Fulp!
Coop83: A flash animiation!
Socially Failed: KWAS!
mr_trivia: No, LittleWashu!
JoKeR_ADT: Mods! Mods!
Nimmer (proudly): A flamer!

EagleRock, surprised, turns to see Nimmer standing there.

EagleRock: Exactly! So, logically…
SlashFirestorm: So, if she weighs…the same…as a flamer…
Ghost_Phantom: …she’s made of a n00b!
EagleRock: And therefore…

The crowd thinks for a second.

-Pingu-: AN ALT!
Crowd: AN ALT!!!

Ghost_Phantom grabs Mutant_BusterJr from the sidelines.

Ghost_Phantom: Here’s a flamer! You can use him!
EagleRock: Very good! We shall use my largest scales!

Brigadier General EagleRock brings hot_and_charming and the rest of the crowd over to the scales. Ghost_Phantom is dragging along Mutant_BusterJr as well. They place the two, one on each side of the scale.

EagleRock: Right. Remove the supports!

Two members of the crowd each knock away the supports underneath the scales. The two sides of the scale creak back and forth for a bit, then the scale levels out even. The crowd goes wild.

Crowd: AN ALT! AN ALT! BURN HER! BURN HER!
hot_and_charming: It’s a fair cop.

As the crowd carries her away for her to be burned, Supreme Command Nimmer approaches Brigadier General EagleRock.

EagleRock: Who are you who are so wise in the ways of the BBS?
Nimmer: I am Supreme Commander Nimmer of the Elite Guard Barracks!
EagleRock (kneels): Sir!
Nimmer: Good Brigadier General, will you come with me to the Elite Guard Barracks?
EagleRock (looks down): I would be honored, sir!
Nimmer: What is your name?
EagleRock (still looking down): “EagleRock,” sir.
Nimmer: Then I dub you, “Major General EagleRock, member of the Elite Guard Barracks!”

LOL. Nice story and congrats on the promotion putting you one step closer to becoming an EGSC.

At 5/11/06 12:11 AM, JoKeR_ADT wrote: Finally I'm now a level 11 and now I have a voting power of 8 votes as well.

Congrats, I thought your name looked better with the punching glove but once I see you with it enough I will get used to it =P. And catching up to me in voting power eh? You will soon pass me though >_>.

Oh slash you might want to get yourself check for any STD's after being with little afro.

lol

=O

I'm new, sir, when do I get to shoot a gun

At 5/11/06 12:11 AM, JoKeR_ADT wrote: Finally I'm now a level 11 and now I have a voting power of 8 votes as well.

Congrats on your level 11 Sir Joker!

Oh slash you might want to get yourself check for any STD's after being with little afro.

I'm staying away from him. lol

SlashFirestorm: ...a bit.
Seamonky: …a bit.
-Pingu-: Yes, yes, a bit.
Ghost_Phantom: But he has got a picture!

Yeah, a bit. I was only in the story for a bit. Great story, umm I think.
I can't Blam or Save a lot because of school. Errrrr.

At 5/11/06 04:39 PM, Dragoon_of_Legend wrote: I'm new, sir, when do I get to shoot a gun

Um...when you get one in real life? This club is for members of Elite Guard rank on Newgrounds. I can't see how many B/P points you have, seeing as you haven't made a public profile, but since you joined Newgrounds yesterday, you're almost certainly of citizen rank.

I remember I once had something above Elite Guard, forgot what it was.. Along with the account.

Who cares about rank, I don't see any other clubs like this one...

At 5/11/06 04:50 PM, Dragoon_of_Legend wrote: I remember I once had something above Elite Guard, forgot what it was.. Along with the account.

If you forgot your old account, make a new account and start all over again.

Who cares about rank, I don't see any other clubs like this one...

You have to have a good rank in order to be in The Elite Guard Barracks.

Congrats to JoKeR for level 11 and passing 1 post per day! =O

At 5/11/06 04:12 PM, EagleRock wrote:

2) Bonus points if you can tell me what movie this is from!

Haha! Quite interesting, always good for a laugh.

But sadly I don't know what movie it's from.

3) I tried to get as many people in this as possible. If you’re left out, I apologize.

Meh, maybe next time. Congrats though!

At 5/11/06 04:50 PM, Dragoon_of_Legend wrote:

I don't see any other clubs like this one...

The NG Department of Defence is similiar to the EG

Read the first page and the last few pages to get a good idea of what it's all about and only ask to join if your sincere.

At 5/11/06 04:12 PM, EagleRock wrote:

2) Bonus points if you can tell me what movie this is from!

well at first i was thinking along the lines of monty python and the holy grail, but im sure that cant be it. got no other guesses...

At 5/11/06 04:50 PM, Dragoon_of_Legend wrote: I remember I once had something above Elite Guard, forgot what it was.. Along with the account.

maybe you did at one time, but we cant let you join with this account. the only requirements are to have a b/p rank of at least elite guard prvate (1500 points, hence the name).

Who cares about rank, I don't see any other clubs like this one...

obviously in here WE care about the rank, because as long as you meet the aforementioned private status and are not an untrustworthy spammer then you can join. and like major punk said, the NGPD is very similar. when you get 300 b/p points go register there and then you can come back when your a private. good luck.

At 5/11/06 04:12 PM, EagleRock wrote: 2) Bonus points if you can tell me what movie this is from!

I'm claimin' them there bonus points, and casting Shame on all other's for not having seen Monty Python's Holy Grail.

Can I cash in my points for a part in the Life of Brian redux?

Jahova! Jahova! Jahova!

At 5/11/06 05:00 PM, Major_punk wrote:

At 5/11/06 04:12 PM, EagleRock wrote:

2) Bonus points if you can tell me what movie this is from!

Haha! Quite interesting, always good for a laugh.

But sadly I don't know what movie it's from.

Noone has guesssed it yet...honestly, the story will be a lot funnier once someone gets it. If noone gets what it is by tonight, I'll tell you.

3) I tried to get as many people in this as possible. If you’re left out, I apologize.

Meh, maybe next time. Congrats though!

DOH. I forgot you! At least you were in the last one... :-/

At 5/11/06 04:50 PM, Dragoon_of_Legend wrote: Who cares about rank, I don't see any other clubs like this one...

We care. Check the FAQ if you're confused. Like the other members have said, you need to be an Elite Guard to be in the Elite Guard Barracks. Best advice I can give you is to make a profile and get 200 B/P. Then you can join our allies at the NGPD Headquarters. Otherwise, I really can't help you.

I have no effing idea when I first made the account, but I know I blammed/saved tons of flashes for only 2 weeks. I didn't have one minute of sleep..

At 5/11/06 05:20 PM, Dragoon_of_Legend wrote: I have no effing idea when I first made the account, but I know I blammed/saved tons of flashes for only 2 weeks. I didn't have one minute of sleep..

Well, when you find the account again, come see us.

At 5/11/06 05:20 PM, Dragoon_of_Legend wrote: I have no effing idea when I first made the account, but I know I blammed/saved tons of flashes for only 2 weeks. I didn't have one minute of sleep..

Do you even know what your old account name was? If you can't remember it by now, or at least ball park it, then you don't convence me at all.