You should think about a series...
You have a knack of giving you characters great emotion. You should attempt to make somewhat of a story. To me, it seems like they are in this living MMORPG and they go around doing adventures.
Also, the winged people are a special breed. Though I'm assuming they are shuned though.
The girl and her secert companion seemed to be great main characters. Also a little love story to boot. She's reckless and prolly known around the world but most people don't know her friend is her hero.
Other than that. I really enjoyed this. You style, choice of music and wittyness of the characters are great. You don't even have to use voices. You seemed to do very well without them. Just use the rush style but instead of random action, try to make them run together. Kinda like a Novela. (Soap Opera for others).