Please help us, shock-value-god!
Many have tried, we have called up to the heavens. For man can not decipher how to work this. Many have seen the prophets and deciphered the works of weapon access. But they have kept silent, and praise you aloud instead of enligghtening others in thier accolades. So I cry to you, O shock-value, hear my plea! send us a prophet to tell us how to see the love of your buddy-hating.
Seriously, though, a lot of us can't get the weapons or skins, and noone will tell us how. Can you? Seriously. It's good, but we can't enjoy it until we figure it out, wich we won't unless it's explained to us. PHEW! This is long.