It has come to my attention that, over the course of the BBS's life, many regulars have been killed under mysterious circumstances or have quit posting unexpectedly at the hight of their career. Livecorpse, Seizure Dog, Hyian Luigi, the list goes on. Now, with Sarai's recent domodding, I have finally figgured out the horrible truth.
Newgrounds has been infiltrated, my friends. Tom is dead. Wade too. Their accounts have been hacked so that the infiltrator can make us think they still live. This site will slowly be assimilated by a certain competitor, until we are Newgrounds no more. Only two men would do such a thing, and they have teamed up against us. Our foes are Joshua M. Bend and Eric Bauman.
Livecorpe did not commit suicide. He was brutally murdered and framed for his own death. Seizure did not leave the BBS of his own accord. He was killed and, like Tom, his account was hacked for his final posts. Those who are no lon ger with us discovered the truth, and paid for it dearly. I, myself, am posting this message as an alt, hoping beyond hope that I can evade the inevitable doom I have brought upon myself by posting this.
My advice to you Newgrounds: Fight the Power! Stand for truth, justice, tankmen, and the liberty to post stupid stuff! (You'll get benned, but at least you can post it). Clocks, Newgrounds is where you belong. If it falls, what will become of B? Sprite authors, what other automated portal could you submit your unfairly hated movies and have a prayer that they will pass? Robots and Barneys....err... in the name of Drew Pickles and who ever the Robots worship, it is your duty to go into battle first (that you may be shot and the world will be rid of your crap movies)!!!
Sarai, my darling, the time is short for you. Your demodding was only the first step in a long and grueling torment that will culminate in you death. It is imperitive that you hurry. First of all, DO NOT RETURN TO YOUR HOUSE!!! Borrow the car of the neighbor who lives two houses down on the left side, and drive it to the place where we first kissed. There, you will find an unmarked envelope, inside of which is a plane ticket. Use the ticket and, when you arrive in your destination city, go to the nearest restaurant of the same franchise as the one where we first met. I will wait for you there, in disguise consisting of various finery, veiled facery, and voice fakery. (It would be wise for you to disguise yourself too). You will recognise me by the fact that I will be wearing the watch you gave me for my birthday last year.
Time is short Newgrounds, and the enemy is tough. Will you stand? Or will you let all you stand for be suckered in by a two bit thief like Ebaum? What say you?
