At 3/31/12 04:17 AM, Gimmick wrote:
Oh, hello there EagleRock! I thought you were inactive all these days!
Yeah...real life really gets in the way sometimes. I wish I could say I was less busy with my life, but it never really seems to get less busy...just more busy. But either way, I'm glad I'm here right now... :-)
At 4/1/12 04:10 PM, byteslinger wrote:
Barracks Roster as of April 1st, 2012:
Thanks for the roster!
At 4/2/12 03:23 PM, byteslinger wrote:
No, not faltering...just been busy with work IRL...I can still hold my own with the best of them - and quite frankly, I'm starting to think that the "0" and "1" buttons on the voting pages just don't work. I keep hitting them, but nothing's working. I'm lucky to get 3 or 4 blams a day - but I know I've been hammering them. I think for the most part I try to blam almost half of what I view / vote on. That's a lot of time spent with nothing to show for it...
Strange you're having trouble with your 0 and 1 keys...for some reason, my whistle just doesn't seem to stop those Flash anymore...can't figure out why... :-)
At 4/2/12 03:23 PM, byteslinger wrote:
Eagle? Is that REALLY YOU?!?!?!?! Holy mother of God, I thought you were abducted by aliens and enjoying endless days of anal probes on your way to Alpha Centuri Prime! You know, you've been MIA a long time...we kinda took your parking spot...and your garden...and your storage area...oh, and part of your office. But we're making a kick-ass entertainment room! Speaking of which, please don't call up Visa and dispute the last four months of billing from Best Buy and the Sharper Image - we ran out of our own funds so we had to subsidize it with your credit cards. You're not too mad now, are you? Look, we made a gamer chair just for you - it has full-body feedback, built-in surround sound 7.2, automatic 3-D visualization heads-up screen, 500Mb triple-channel wireless directly to your servers of choice, and full hand-motion control. No more keyboards - just flail your hands in front of you to control the system. It puts XBOX Kinects to shame.
So, are you gonna stick around some more, or was this just a cameo walk-on part?
Ah, if it isn't the dear Byteslinger, who through her bombastic personality, jocular jabbing towards my recent absence, and her otherwise unrelenting and incessant need to consistently bust my balls, really makes me feel at home. It is through a mere two-line post that I have unleashed a torrent (no, not a .torrent, Byte) of witty repartee of which I must linguistically dodge and parry in a good ol' fashioned verbal throw-down.
The fact of the matter is, my dear Byte, that your purported creative liberties that were taken with my quarters weren't exactly taken against my will. You see, I knew that once you started creeping into my quarters to fit your frivolous Best Buy purchases, you and the other Barracks members would thus be compelled to spend further. Hence why I left my credit card unattended only in a five-stage combination safe with only rudimentary 512-bit encryption on the digital portion of the lock. Naturally, as you were cracking away, the by-standing Barracks members (especially Coop) were eyeing my watch collection, conveniently displayed next to the safe in 6-inch bulletproof glass with a containment system even your grubby "grey-hat" couldn't dream of getting her hands on.
Naturally, once you gained access to the credit card safe, it was off to Garden State Plaza with you and the Barracks, off to the Best Buy. I then, through my expert social engineering, compelled you all to walk into Torneau and talk to the 19-year old pimply-faced guy behind the counter talking about expensive watches. After about 5 minutes of getting nowhere with the kid (after all, this is the one that thinks "Patek" rhymes with "wreck"), you and the rest of the members being wandering, conveniently to the Sharper Image (the one right past the calorie-o-rama California Pizza Kitchen).
Of course, with Eagle's credit card in hand, the $400 iPhone controlled helicopter doesn't seem like a frivolous purchase, right? Naturally you and the rest went crazy with your shopping spree, racking up my credit card as I, again, predicted. It was here that I ensured the owner of the Sharper Image installed all of those RFID tags in all of the devices you people bought.
Now, the only device I really cared to RFID tag happened to be that silent dehumidifier you always wanted, which I knew would not make into the gamer's den that was previously my office, but rather, that little hole-in-the-wall basement complex you've been building underneath the Barracks where you've been stealing all of my hardware. Granted, it was only 7 or 8 IBM x3950's, but I'll be damned if you're going to siphon off the Barracks goods on my watch.
So, needless to say, I have already confiscated said hardware, thanks in part to the RFID tag on the device that made it down there, due to your need for a HEPA filter in your little server cave. It appears your natural aversion to airborne particles in this time of year is what did you in.
Am I mad? Nah. Playing into my trap rarely ever makes me upset. I will, however, put you on maintenance duty. Manually updating my 564 Debian servers without aid of shell scripting nor SSH without password. Don't say I didn't warn you. :-)
Okay, I had enough of that :-) I'll leave you with two things:
First, to those of you that said there was no April Fools jokes this year, don't forget this one:
And second, I'll leave this little bit of geek porn you might be interested in right here:
eaglerock@delorean:501:~$ uptime
21:09:01 up 502 days, 4:18, 4 users, load average: 0.15, 0.17, 0.16