lolguys why can't you make some kind of e-alcohol so this place can be fun again you're making me all emo here I'm like lolwut. Seriously... my functionality has dropped to a point at which I'm ACTUALLY MAKING A THREAD. WHAT THE FUCK.
So then I fucked her in the ass again and got beef soup in my hair. Alex was all "LOLNOWAY YOU DID NOT JUST TAKE A SHOWER" but she was all "HAHA I TOTALLY DID! PWN!"
I am held by the heel when I feel like it.
The thing is though, about this internet cafe, I'm all worried that they can hear our obscene RG set last night. Because, y'know, like any REAL internetter I'm listening to it RIGHT NOW. That's the only way you make up for not being a part of it in the first place. Listening to it AT LEAST fourteen times in a row and MEMORISING EVERY SINGLE SECOND.
Otherwise my ego won't be fed, and I'll cry. Tears of semen, guys. The orgy fucked me up so much my tear ducts actually turned into semen ducts to cope with the constant and insane requirement for sperm. It's seriously something you have to see with your own eyes to believe it.
But I can't wait until my next emotional moment with someone in which I start crying and they're all sympathetic and shit and use their finger to wipe away one of my tears, but then they look at their finger and they're like "WTF IS THIS SHIT." and I won't be able to contain the laughter as I say "HAHAHAHA YOU HAVE MY TADPOLIES SWIMMING ON YOUR FINGER! LOOK! LOOK AT THEM! THEY'RE HUMPING YOUR FINGERTIP! lolrofflewaffles."
I'd just like to take this opportunity to mention one thing that has always been there for me in my life. Nothing. You can count on nothing my friends. Nothing will always be there, so if you have SOMETHING, ANYTHING, stfu and be grateful for what you have. My erection is seriously in a raping mood right now, so anyone who fucks around gets fucked around.
HARDCORE.
MOER LIEK H4RDC0R3 wtfnoob
You fucking guys and your controversy "omg some guys are having fun with homoerotic imagery we can't have that instead of just never watching it I'll get my titis in a twist, complain and make it worse for other people! hahaha! I have the best ideas!"
I'm putting myself out on a limb here guys. I'm just so confused about my sexuality and as such cannot stand to see other people actually comfortable with themselves and the things that get their genitals working like they should so I HULK SMASH THEM.
Kinda like interracial porn, but not really. Haha oh man I seriously wanted to blow the n horn in this sentence but I didn't want some random african-americans who don't understand to beat me up, even though I'm in a predominately asian internet cafe without a black person in sight. I don't recall the last time I ever saw a black man in an internet cafe. Maybe it's forbidden ground from them, so if I ever get in a spot of bother with the people with the more darker complexions I'll run into an internet cafe and be all "LOLYOUCAN'TGETMEPWNED."
And they'll be all ": ("
Whoa caps, and mother bitch. Freeze mother bitches.
SO WHAT'S GOING ON WITH YOU GUYS? If any of you ever actually establish a pineapple under the sea, send me an invite and I'll totally come and chill with you guys. That sore spot Squidward can bring the grog and then we'll lock him out while he gets stung by numerous jellyfish.
FUCK MAN. This internet cafe keeps playing the same song... it's almost as if they don't even know what music is, and someone was like "haha hey man the other day I found this weird contraption on the ground it's kind of circular with a hole in it, when you put it in things crazy stuff happens to my ears." and so now he can't get enough.
When someone has like, half-facial hair it's funny. They're either going through puberty or can't shave, so you look at it and just think "loln00bfacialhair."
Kinda like that RedCircle fellow. Well, not really. But TBF knows how it's done. And ramagi, but don't tell anyone I told you. She's pretty insecure about it. I tried to shave it for her once and I blunted at least three razors. I couldn't believe it. I was like "WUT, DO YOU HAVE STEEL GROWING OUT OF YOUR FACE OR SOMETHING? GODDAMN."
And he did. I felt bad then, because I didn't really want ramagi to be damned by God, but sometimes these things just make their way out of your mouth and you can't do anything about it.
It got me on the trail of thought concerning time travel. Stood in my back yard was Peter, with a Flux Capicitor. He took me to the year 3000, not much has changed but we live underwater. And there's naked chicks with three breasts. Unfortunately all three are fake.
Kinda like females on the internet, but we won't tell them that either.
Hey can someone pass me that gravy pot over there I'm kinda thirsty and am about to throw up. lolvomitgravy. Secret ingredient, motherfuckers. Enough.
hahaha still coming down from meetup drunk I'm sorry guys plz don't use the spiky dildo. : (